


To the indifferent stars above

by Vampiric_Charms



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Kylo Amidala, M/M, Soft Kylux, and lots of pretty clothes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-03-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:34:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22851076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vampiric_Charms/pseuds/Vampiric_Charms
Summary: Armitage Hux is forced to join his father on an absurd diplomatic visit to Naboo, as Arkanis seeks mining rights to another planet in Naboo’s control.  There, he has a clandestine - and completely accidental - meeting with a stranger who helps Hux find himself amid the chaotic mess his life has turned into.  And, perhaps, this stranger who is not actually a stranger at all, can lead Hux toward a path he never really imagined was possible.
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 35
Kudos: 120





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning for this one: Brendol Hux is terrible and still hits his son.
> 
> This is the first thing I've written in almost a year? So a big thank you to my two best friends - one of whom spent hours with me looking up planets and trading routes and weather patterns, and a whole bunch of stuff I didn't end up using; the second, who kept cheering me on when I started this ridiculous thing, and then was just as excited as I was. <3
> 
> The story is done, and will likely be posted in three chapters over the next two weeks or so. I listened to [these](https://youtu.be/iHVAavqLsMM) [three](https://youtu.be/pp_rhJFN5X0) [amazing](https://youtu.be/IXy6PZPJtSA) albums by audiomachine for the entire process. Title comes from this [beautiful poem](https://allpoetry.com/A-Dream-Of-Death) by Yeats.
> 
> Enjoy!

Hux was lost, utterly and completely.

The walls of the city rose around him, the hustle of an open-air market pressing in on all sides as he wove his way through the stalls, buffeted by patrons and cried at by sellers. He was furious with himself. Furious for getting lost, and furious for even allowing himself to get angry enough to stalk off in the first place. He needed to find his way back to his retinue, to the congregation of ambassadors - back to his damnable father.

He glowered as the sun beat down onto the paved streets, making sweat roll down his neck and into the high collar of his elegant tunic, ready for the stupid assembly he was meant to be attening in less than an hour. His nose was hot, and he was quite certain it was burning a bright red his father would have his hide for. Unbidden, he missed the rains of Arkanis with an ache he felt all the way through his core.

Throngs of people shoved past him as he walked nowhere, lacking purpose and growing more agitated by the second as he became more turned around. Theed was far more crowded than he recalled it seeming on the holorecords he had studied weeks back, just after this trip was confirmed, and he hated it. He hated all of it.

Damn his father for pushing him, and damn himself for reacting like a _child_.

“You seem lost.”

Hux spun, looking for the voice that was most certainly directed at him. A tall man, cloaked with the hood pulled over his head, was leaning against the wall just on the other side of the stall Hux had stopped in front of, watching him with unnerving interest. He flicked ash from a thin cigarette before raising it back to his mouth for a long drag. Hux stared at him, a scowl firm on his face. The assumption alone made him bristle, whether it was true or not.

(It _was_ true, and Hux seethed for it.)

The man shrugged at Hux’s lack of outward response. “You are obviously not from around here,” he said calmly, releasing smoke from his mouth as he spoke. Even from where Hux stood he could smell the sweetness of whatever was burning in that cigarette. It was cloying, intoxicating. The man did not seem to care. “You don’t look like you’ve stepped foot on Naboo before this very moment.”

The stall’s proprietor suddenly appeared and barked, “Buy something or move on, buddy!” and Hux turned that scowl on the owner for only a brief second before stepping away from her stall so a paying customer could approach.

“Look,” the stranger said, tossing his cigarette to a paving stone and grinding it out under the toe of his heavy black boot. “I couldn’t care less about what you’re doing, wandering around here like some feral nexu, but I can at least point you in the right direction. How ‘bout it?”

Hux glanced back over his shoulder at the masses of people crowding the market, then up at the tall walls and buildings around him. “Fine,” he grumbled, moving closer to the man as he stood straighter off the wall, ready to hear what Hux had to say. “I need to get to the palace. I’ve lost my way from the shuttle.”

“The palace!” The stranger laughed, and then beckoned for Hux to follow him without any confirmation that was where they were going. It was several steps before Hux actually did follow, still wary and angry and hating every second of this interaction. “You’re in luck,” he said, ignoring Hux’s obvious irritation, “I need to head that way myself. I’ll bring you around the back, away from all the - ” he gestured behind them, to the congested streets of the market, “- away from this.”

“I hate this planet,” Hux grumbled, taking several large strides to keep up with this man who was already several ahead of him.

The stranger looked over his shoulder, amusement written all over his shadowed face under that stupid low hood. “Do you, now?” he asked, though the question sounded rhetorical and he kept walking without waiting for a response. 

“This sun, the heat - yes, I hate it.”

The man slowed his pace slightly and looked again at Hux, his eyes still shining with laughter. They were brown, Hux noticed when he found himself unexpectedly close to the man’s side, the irises almost copper in the sunlight he hated so much, and surrounded by thick dark lashes. His nose, his lips, his entire _face_ was actually quite…beautiful. Otherworldly, even, with a pale scar running along one cheek. Hux pursed his lips and stared back stubbornly, refusing to let any of those thoughts continue. 

“Am I correct in presuming you are part of the retinue from Arkanis, the planet where it rains every second of every day? And yet you hate our sunlight?”

Hux huffed a short, undignified chortle. “Arkanis is more than just rain.”

“So I _am_ right! You’re with those stuffy dignitaries trying to dig their way into our mining rights.” The stranger shook his head and kept walking, Hux hot on his heels with flaring indignation.

“And what do you know of it?” Hux retorted, unable to keep his anger in check and out of his voice. He wasn’t exactly angry with this man he did not know, but the toll of the day was sinking in and that awfully familiar anxiety was mounting, the closer the got to the palace. “We have been working on these negotiations for months, simply to get minimal mineral rights on Crait, which you have the majority of!” He broke off, scoffing, only to plunge ahead. “Your king only just agreed to even consider it, and you have the _gall_ to act as if you know of the matter. We need those mineral rights,” he added hotly. “Naboo is wealthy enough -”

“And Arkanis isn’t?” the stranger interrupted, his deep voice still infuriatingly calm as he rebuked Hux’s tirade. “I was under the impression Arkanis is quite wealthy in its own right.”

Hux fell silent, fuming. The man glanced at him over his shoulder, those dark and piercing eyes meeting his as if he could pull Hux’s very soul out of his body with that gaze. Hux looked away, watching his feet as they climbed a set of stairs between two gleaming white pillars. They were nearing their destination, if the quality of marble was any indication.

Finally Hux sighed, the apprehension in his chest tightening until it felt difficult to breathe. He forced himself to continue walking, each step heavy. “I suppose I am not exactly sure what rights the ambassadors are after.”

It wasn’t true, not at all. Hux was intimately aware of the negotiations, had written draft after draft after draft of speeches for the ambassadors, documents for them to review, even invitations to the stupid, selfish king of this gods-forsaken planet. He knew exactly why they were there, what they were arguing for - but at the moment he didn’t care, for the negotiations or for any of this at all.

The man looked at him again as Hux finished speaking, surprised this time, and he slowed to a stop at the top of the stairs. “Then why are you here with them?”

“That, I’m afraid, is a rather long story I do not care to go into with someone I have only just met,” Hux said shortly. He stopped as well, swallowing through the unease that continued to grow as the rounded walls of the palace came into view. He pointed vaguely ahead of them. “That’s it, then?”

“Yes,” the stranger confirmed, tilting his head curiously as that gaze dug into Hux’s soul once again. He abruptly tugged his hood down, unruly waves of black hair spilling over his shoulders. That scar came into sharper contrast when exposed to the sun, a gash of poorly healed flesh marring his skin. He seemed concerned, suddenly, as the sun glared down on them both, and Hux took a step back in preparation to part ways. The last thing he needed was for this beautiful man he did not know to - 

“Are you all right?”

The question took him off guard even as he feared it was coming and his eyes snapped back to the man’s, who was still staring at him. Even as everything fell heavy and dense across Hux’s shoulders, even as his anxiety churned hard against his ribs, even as a part of him longed to say _no, I hate this, I hate my life, help me help me_ \- he backed away.

“Thank you for the direction,” he said with a curt nod.

“Yeah, no problem.”

The man, whose name Hux wanted to know but refused to enquire after, just watched silently from the landing of the stairs as Hux pushed past him and trudged toward the palace and the group he had fled only an hour before. Toward his father.

xXx

The collection of ambassadors he arrived with had already been herded away when Hux finally returned. A porter was waiting for him on the grand staircase just outside the glorious main entrance to the palace, and he guided Hux silently through the curving marble and gilded halls to a wing far from the center of the building. Everything here was so bright, so white and gold and blue and green, and Hux’s eyes hurt from the brilliance of it all.

The porter opened a large wooden door embellished with inlaid mother-of-pearl floral detailing. The room on the other side was like a palace in and of itself, a luxurious sitting room with thick woven rugs over the marble floors, velvet curtains of several deep colors hanging over the open floor to ceiling windows. Lush chairs, loveseats, couches, tables with vases of flowers were huddled in several places throughout the room, the largest congregation arranged around a massive fireplace set into the wall.

The room was bright from the natural sunlight streaming through those huge windows, the warmth oppressive even without a fire being lit. Four small hallways branched off this main living area, lined with bedrooms and making the entire space seem overly large.

The porter pointed Hux to the closest hall and the door immediately to the right, explaining this was where Hux’s things had been brought but he could pick another empty room in the apartment if he so chose.

Hux turned to thank him, but his father appeared suddenly in the doorway at the end of that first hallway. “It’s about bloody time!” he thundered, already angry and his face a pinched purple that clashed horribly with his hair - the same color as Hux’s. “Where in all the hells have you been, boy?”

Hux attempted to ignore the question as best he could, noticing that the porter had scurried away. Perhaps Brendol had already released his vitriol against the poor man, who had no wish to see that repeated. Hux couldn’t blame him, really. He opened the door that had been shown to him, not surprised to see his two modest bags of possessions lined up neatly beside the bed.

If the living space was luxurious, the bedroom was above and beyond. The bed was a dark wooden four-poster, hung with a delicate off-white gauzy fabric that trailed to the floor, brushed to and fro in the gentle wind from two open windows. The windows themselves looked out over a great lake on the far side of the palace, everything deep blue and bright green. A decently sized old-fashioned writing desk was near the corner of one wall, taking in the perfect natural light, and a wardrobe was beside it. Tapestries and those same velvet curtains hung from walls and windows alike. It was as if he had stepped into a fairytale, with how opulent and strikingly different everything was compared to his home planet. 

He pulled one of his bags up onto the bed, rustling the light blankets it had been covered in for the cool summer nights.

Their group was supposed to be returning to that great hall at the center of the palace shortly, for an official meeting between themselves and the king, and Hux knew he needed to change into something he hadn’t sweated through.

Anxiety swelled again as he pulled out another silver-hued shirt to replace the finer one he had on. He wished very hard, in that moment, that he could just go home.

“You had better be ready to leave in two minutes,” his father said shortly, crowding the doorway of Hux’s appointed bedroom. “Make yourself presentable, you are an absolute _mess_. Do not ruin this by looking like - ” He gestured vaguely up and down Hux’s body, a sneer on his lips, “- that.”

Hux bit back his retort and swallowed it, though this only made the anxious sickness settling in his stomach worse. But he changed his shirt anyway, once his father was gone, and went to the mirror set in the wardrobe to check his hair. It was just as in place as it ever was, but he’d been right; his nose was bright red with sunburn. The ridges of his cheekbones were pink with sun, too. A disaster, is what he looked like. 

His father was right to worry his presence could ruin things.

_Wasn’t he? Right?_

He pressed his lips together, hard, against the apprehension in his chest and joined the gathering amassing in the living room. It was nearly time to leave.

xXx

There were two other delegations in the Great Hall from different planets and for various reasons. They were all directed to line themselves on either side of the large arched doorway, to make a kind of corridor for when the king arrived. It would be easiest, the valets and porters explained to the irritated conglomeration of imposed patrons here to speak to the king personally. Several of them were angry that would not be happening just yet, but everyone lined up as instructed.

Hux took his place beside his father, to the left, so he would be seen last just as Brendol wanted. Unimportant and only here for necessity. Perhaps he wouldn’t be seen at all, as was both his and his father’s wish.

The king’s entrance was not heralded by trumpets, the way Hux would have imagined after all he’d heard about the man. Instead he simply walked into the room unannounced, beginning the introductions down the line himself. Hux stared, somewhat taken aback by his sudden presence, and tried his best to make his stupid body smaller. 

The king, titled Kylo Amidala as was the tradition, was tall - taller than Hux expected after only seeing brief holorecordings of him during his research. He was dressed in flowing black robes with wide, billowing sleeves and a tunic that opened into a long draping skirt over a pair of perfectly fit trousers. The entire ensemble was dotted with tiny faceted crystals, and they looked like stars, glimmering with every movement - as though the galaxy itself were draped around him. Even through the robes, though, Hux could see how broad his shoulders were, how he carried himself evenly and without fear. Arrogance, he almost thought, but somehow that wasn’t the word he wanted to use. 

His face was covered with the traditional makeup, white and red over his skin, and a great feathered and gemmed headpiece sat atop his hair to match his sparkling robes. But something...something pulled Hux’s attention as the king moved down the line at a slow pace, speaking quietly with everyone as he went. Something about his face was oddly familiar, even under the regalia of his home’s custom. Something about his nose, the slant of his lips.

And then Amidala turned to face Brendol, and Hux felt everything inside him freeze to a poisonous ice. Those _eyes_. They looked black against the stark white painting his face, but they weren’t, they were brown, and Hux had seen them less than an hour ago. This close he could even see the faint faint faint line of a scar dissecting his face, a scar he had seen in sunlit detail on the face of a stranger.

The stranger he had said everything to, everything about how he hated himself and this planet and the king and their dealings. The stranger who had guided him back here, to his now-certain doom. How could he have been so stupid, so _foolish_! His father would kill him, if he found out. Absolutely kill him, as he’d wanted to do on too many occasions already. Hux _wanted_ to die, even, as he felt the weight of his atrocious mistake settle around him, constricting around his chest. He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t _breathe_. 

Those dark brown and horribly inscrutable eyes settled on Hux, as though he could hear his internal screaming from across the room. But then - 

“Your Majesty.”

Hux’s father was speaking, Hux heard it as though through water, as though he was drowning, and he almost choked on a gasp as he attempted vainly to get himself under control. His heart was beating far too fast, he knew it was, and yet -

“I am Brendol Hux, Commandant and High Ambassador of Arkanis.” He gave a short bow, obviously expecting his son to do the same, but Hux could only stand there, frozen with his terror and his panic and his wild wild heart. But then - 

“And this is my secretary, Armitage.” Brendol spat the word, both his name and weak position as if they were tainted, and then gripped Hux’s shoulder tightly, squeezed in a way he knew would hurt, a way that would bruise, and hissed, “Bow, you ungrateful - ”

“Your _secretary_?”

That voice, his horribly familiar voice, sent Hux spiraling, quite sure he was about to topple over with the heavy leaden dread driving through him, through every vein. Amidala sounded angry, sounded disgusted, as he repeated the word his father used with the same disdain.

“You call this man your secretary?” Amidala repeated tightly when Brendol just stared, startled by the question rather than the expected small talk.

“He is my son, Your Majesty,” Brendol replied, recovering quickly. He shot Hux an angry, angry glare before looking again to the king when he didn't move away from them. “He is only fit to be a secretary in my contingent, he is worthless for much else. As I am sure you will find,” he added with another seething glare in Hux’s direction.

But Amidala only stared, first at Brendol and then at Hux, his glittering eyes cool and dispassionate just like the galaxy of gems swirling around him. 

“I see.”

And then he walked onward, to the other side of the line and a woman waiting impatiently for her turn. Hux knew he was trembling now, with fear for what he had done and what his father would do to him for it. He’d ruined everything, he well and truly had.

As soon as the stiff lines broke down for people to mingle after their introductions, Hux fled.

He briefly saw Kylo Amidala turn in his direction from far across the room, those dark dark eyes following him as he went.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another trigger warning for brief abuse/violence early in the chapter.

“What have you done!”

It was hours later, long after Hux retreated to the palace bedroom assigned to him. He was sitting on the floor with his back against the bed, staring vacantly out the large windows as Naboo’s sun sank lower and lower, feeling the cooling evening breeze against his face and not even caring enough to get up to close the panes against them.

His father’s voice was expected, so long after Hux had run off, but he stayed where he was. He couldn’t move. He couldn’t breathe. He wanted to die, everything in him screamed for it. This was his fault, he knew it was, through and through.

Brendol shoved the bedroom door open so hard it bounced off the marble wall. Hux thought wildly that he might have cracked the stone and wanted, quite absurdly given the horrible circumstances, to laugh at the notion - but he reigned himself in before he could make things worse, as he always somehow did. Brendol was furious, his face almost purple and his eyes wide, bloodshot. 

Hux did not look at him.

“Boy, what did you do!” he yelled again when his first question remained unanswered. Brendol stalked across the room without preamble and grabbed Hux’s arm, jerking him to his feet. His shoulder screamed with the pain of it, but Hux did not wince as he may have years before - nor did he try to pull away. He felt disconnected, like this was happening to someone else, someone not himself. He couldn’t think. Everything in his mind was blank, unseeing. 

“That damnable king is refusing to sit down for the negotiations we were promised! You did this, I know you did!”

Brendol released Hux’s arm with a sharp push, and Hux stumbled away, finally starting to come back to his senses enough to at least keep from falling. Should he lie? Should he try to explain? He didn’t even know anymore, didn’t understand anything that had happened in the last several hours. It felt like a dream. It _was_ a dream, surely. It had to be. Had to be, had to be.

Hux had never felt more powerless, more subdued and beaten down. A dream, then. It truly must be. Brendol raised his hand, his fist connecting hard with Hux’s cheek before he could bring any words to his defense, before he could speak at all. Before he could understand.

He reeled backward, hand sluggishly covering his stinging cheek in a startled kind of wonder as his eyes watered with pain. It had been a very long time since his father had struck him, but he was somehow unsurprised it had come now, again. He felt like a little boy, and he hated himself. Hated himself for everything he had ever tried to do. His life was such a _joke_.

“You tell me what you did, Armitage, or you will regret stepping foot on that shuttle yesterday!”

“Your son did nothing,” a voice said from behind him, deep and unyielding with fury. “And I would appreciate it if you would lower your arm and refrain from hitting anyone else while you are on my planet or I will have you arrested for hostility. Your violence will not be tolerated here.”

Brendol spun around, his face reddening now from the unwelcomed chastisement. His rage was still palpable, and Hux used his distraction to take several unconscious steps backward, away from him and out of his painful reach. It was only seconds later that he refocused his dizzying gaze away from his father and over his shoulder instead, where Kylo Amidala and most of the Arkanis ambassadors were standing just outside the door watching this pathetic spectacle. 

One of the ambassadors spoke up when a stiff silence fell. Mitaka. “I - I’m sorry sir, he knocked and asked to speak with you - ”

But Hux could barely hear him through his foggy brain. His words didn’t compute, somehow. 

“Well.” Brendol flicked at his shoulders, as though removing dust after a scuffle - the scuffle being him, hating his son. “I don’t suppose now is a good time. Your Majesty.”

Amidala stared at him, dark eyebrows narrowed. He looked frightening, then, as anger seeped over his painted features. His eyes, black in this darkening light, flicked from Hux to Brendol, where they glared fiercely. He was still dressed in the full regalia from before, the galaxy-dusted robe and immense headdress, and he was formidable even in this crowded bedroom.

Hux wanted to laugh, wanted to scream, at how farcical his life had become.

He didn’t do either.

“Then I suppose it is a good thing I am not here to speak to you, Commandant Hux,” Amidala said coldly to Brendol’s intended brushoff. “I am here to speak to your _secretary_.”

Again with that damned word. But then, very quickly, what Amidala said sunk in, and Hux stared at him, baffled and unsure after everything that had happened in those last spiraling minutes. Amidala’s black-brown eyes stared back, unwavering, and something in him felt magnetized, energized. “A walk, perhaps?” Amidala said to him, ignoring Brendol completely now. “The gardens will be blooming with nightflowers soon, and we can continue our discussion from earlier.”

There was no command in the request, and it was that - the genuine request of it - that finally made Hux’s feet move again. He slid past his father’s thunderous expression, and the ambassadors stepped away from the door so he could leave unimpeded.

None of this made sense. 

Hux walked as if on autopilot with adrenaline-trembling legs, aware but also not, of Kylo Amidala beside him as they left the guest quarters. A valet was standing just outside the massive mother-of-pearl door, waiting for direction from his king. Amidala nodded to him and the valet closed the door, separating them from the rest of the Arkanis delegation as they moved down the marble hallway, away from them, away from his father.

As soon as they rounded a corner, Amidala paused and reached up to remove the headdress. His valet was ready, and took it easily in exchange for a small hand towel. Amidala’s hair, which Hux remembered now with a startling clarity was down to his shoulders, was pulled back in two braids wrapping around the crown of his head - a crown in their own right. Hux just stared, unspeaking and reeling from the last few minutes. 

He still did not feel like he could breathe, and he put a hand to his chest to rub his sternum. It didn’t help.

The valet walked away with the headpiece. All Hux could do was continue to stare as Amidala scrubbed the hand towel over his face, easily removing the customary makeup to leave his pale skin uncovered and dotted instead with little black freckles. He was still wearing the galaxy-gem robes, and Hux could see now how delicate the dark fabric was, how every little crystal was placed so perfectly.

“There,” Amidala said once he was finished removing the thick makeup, depositing the towel on the sill of the window behind him. “That’s much better. So, want to take that walk? I promise not to let you get lost.”

Hux realized he hadn’t spoken yet, hadn’t spoken in _hours_ , and he cleared his throat with a tense little cough. “I’m sorry you had to see all that,” he said, referring to his father and to everything else Hux had done since that afternoon. Everything he had done his entire life. “Your Majesty,” he added quickly, ducking his head in a modest bow.

Amidala waved his hand, making a tsk-ing noise with his tongue. “You don’t have to apologize for your dick of a father. And please, I hate all the fucking formalities, especially after a day like today. My name is Ben.”

Amidala - Ben - started walking off down the hall, confident that Hux would follow, which he did. Ben led him down another deserted hallway, then another, and then through a set of marvelous glass doors until they were outside.

It was fully dusk now, the sun almost below the horizon and casting everything in a dark hue before the moons rose. Gardens swept around them, fragrant and green and everything a palace garden should be. But Ben kept walking, and Hux kept following him. They passed through the garden, and then through an arched hedgerow, down through a field strewn with wildflowers turning their tiny faces up to the last of the sunlight. 

Ben finally stopped when he reached the lake’s shore and sat down where the grass of the field gave way to a small strip of dusty sand dipping into the water. They were still in visual distance of the palace, not very far at all, but Hux felt like he had stepped into another world. He wished he had.

Hesitating only a moment, uncertain of this ever-changing predicament he found himself in, he sat down, too, beside Ben in the grass. Lights flickered over the gentle laps of water, from the palace and the city around it, glittering and bright and nothing like the lakes on Arkanis, which were always in a state of uproar with storms. This was...different. This was calm. Calmer than Hux had known a lake could be. 

“Is your father always like that?”

The question startled him back to reality, and Hux looked over at Ben in the dusky twilight. His robes were still glimmering and magnificent, and Hux blinked before turning his gaze out at the lake again. “Yes,” he finally replied.

Ben made a small noise in his throat. It sounded angry, though Hux did not look at him again to confirm these suspicions.

But then Ben moved, reaching out toward him, and Hux flinched back instinctually, away from whatever unknown contact was coming. He was still on alert, still unable to stop thinking and thinking and thinking about what he was going to do, about what his father was going to do to him. Nothing made _sense_. 

Ben’s hand pulled away, his fingers curled over his palm. “Sorry,” he said, meaning it. “I just - can I touch your cheek?”

He was gesturing to the cheek Brendol had hit, and Hux noticed then that it hurt, that it was raw and bruised and ugly. Shame clenched acidly in his stomach and he shook his head in the negative.

“You shouldn’t be ashamed for the way your father treats you,” Ben murmured, dropping his hand to his lap. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t think you ever have.”

“You don’t even know me,” Hux retorted defensively. He wasn’t sure why he was defensive, really, but he felt flayed open and he still couldn’t breathe through the brutal anxiety crushing against his ribs like some creature intent on suffocating him. He put his hands in the grass behind him and leaned back, turning his gaze up toward the sky as two of Naboo’s moons rose to replace the sun with their brilliance. “In fact,” he continued, bolstored somehow by the fact that he was still so detached from himself, “what is even happening right now? Why did you come whisk me away after I made a fool of myself earlier?”

“Are you really asking me that?” Ben said with a derisive snort. Hux looked at him, confused and angry for it, and Ben shook his head. “I liked you,” he explained, as if this answered all of Hux’s concerns. “From the market earlier. I liked that you didn’t speak to me like everyone else does.”

Something in Hux’s soul burst into flame at that, all of his fears, all of his humiliation, pulled to the immediate surface of his thoughts. “Are you telling me you _liked_ the way I made a fool of myself in front of you?” he snapped, unable to keep the indignation from his voice. “You liked that I didn’t know who you were, and thus ruined everything we came here for? You _liked_ it?” His face turned into a furious snarl, his fury impossible to tamp down now that it had been given voice. “My father wants to murder me, and you liked it? We are going to leave here in shame because of my actions - ”

“No, no,” Ben interrupted, and it infuriated Hux even more that he seemed so utterly unperturbed by his outburst. “I was intrigued to hear your delegation’s arguments tomorrow, after speaking with you so unguarded. It was your father who dashed all the hopes he had of taking our rights to Crait. The way he treated you in the Great Hall. That’s when I told my aide to remove the meeting from my schedule. I didn’t - you didn’t have anything to do with that choice. You did nothing wrong.”

These words echoed what Ben had told his father before, that Hux was somehow miraculously not at fault, and it worked to soothe the irate beast that had exploded from Hux’s chest. Some of his anxiety bled away, loosing itself from his tumbling thoughts. He remembered the way Brendol had grabbed his shoulder, had told Amidala that he, Hux, was worthless. Amounted to nothing.

“You are not nothing,” Ben said, and Hux glanced at him, wondering if he had said that out loud. “And I came back for you after the stupid royal meeting because…” 

He trailed off, and Hux continued to stare at him. Ben looked up at the sky, at the moons, at the stars starting to dot through the velvet expanse of darkness - just like the robes he still wore, glittering around him. “Because I could hear you,” he finally said with a self-dismissive wave of his hand toward his braid-crowned head, as though this were a completely normal thing to say. “I could hear you, asking for someone to help you. Though maybe not in so many words. You don’t ask for help, do you?”

Hux remembered, abruptly, the rumors that flew among the ambassadors about this Kylo Amidala being a magician, a Force user descended from a line of very powerful Jedi. He did not know if there was any truth to this, but suddenly those rumors started to ring true. He wasn’t sure how he felt about this revelation that the man beside him might be able to read his mind. 

“Are you, then? A - a sorcerer like they say?” he asked, unable to help it. 

“Hardly a sorcerer!” Ben said with a deep chuckle, not offended at all by Hux’s question. “But my grandfather, and then my mother, are both very strong with the Force. Only my grandfather was a Jedi, though, and I obviously did not follow him down that path.”

There was something self-deprecating in those words, a sentiment Hux was far too familiar with. He curled his fingers into the grass behind him, into the cool damp earth, and felt grounded there, grounded and seen and understood. It was an unfamiliar feeling, being understood, even at a surface level.

“I’m afraid I do not know much about the Force,” Hux admitted softly. “Could you not follow both paths, the one of your grandfather and the - the life you have now?”

Ben looked at him, his gaze soft and considering, and Hux could swear the stars high in the sky above were somehow reflected in those dark dark eyes. The stars, or perhaps the glittering gems that still twinkled as Ben crossed his legs at the ankle. The question hung between them, as if it were also being asked of Hux himself - why he was where he was, rather than forging his own way.

Finally Ben sighed wistfully and stared out across the water. “I was born stuck between two worlds,” he explained quietly. Hux was enthralled, the way Ben’s voice dipped so deeply as he gave words to his story catching at Hux and not letting go. “This one, here, with my grandmother’s people, and a world surrounded by the Force through my grandfather. I did not have a choice, in deciding which world I wanted to live in. The choice was made for me, without my consent.”

“I think I know something about that, not having a choice,” Hux whispered.

“I believe you do, yes.”

Hux bit his lip for a moment before asking, “Are you - I mean to say, did you still learn to use the Force, like your grandfather?”

Ben nodded, his eyes focused on something far away as he considered. “Yes,” he replied after a moment. “When I was young, when he and my uncle wanted me to follow in their footsteps instead of my mother’s. It was what I wanted, too.” He flopped backward into the grass, lying flat on his back and now staring up at the stars, at the deep velvet navy of the sky. “But then my mother left Naboo to become a senator when I was seventeen. It was decided then that I would be put in the running for the royal election, in her place. Once I was elected, that was that. Anything I learned to do with the Force became a party trick. Useless.”

Hux looked down at him, his pale skin and dark hair and those sparkling robes set off by the verdant green underneath him even in the darkness. He had not known any of this, not really. Certainly he knew of Leia Organa, who now lived on Coruscant without her son. He knew of Han Solo, not suited to the lifestyle of a royal family and now darting through the galaxy with his own life regardless of his child. He knew nothing about what this man - what Ben - had given up for a planet who needed him.

He had done so much research before their trip, reading every biographic he could get his hands on of the king of Naboo in the hopes of winning their case. Of course, all the photos that had been included with those bios had been of Kylo Amidala, dressed to the nines with his face covered in white and red. Hux flushed slightly across his cheekbones to think he hadn’t recognized Ben in the market all those hours before. But how could he have?

Ben laughed, meeting Hux’s eyes. “I am quite different without the finery, aren’t I?” he asked with a lopsided smile as he repeated what Hux was just thinking, which made Hux’s flush deepen. “The paint hides all of my flaws.”

“You do not have any flaws, you’re beautiful,” Hux retorted before he could even consider the words coming out of his mouth. As soon as he heard what he had said, he felt his face burn red. “I mean - ”

“Hey, don’t take it back!” Ben interrupted with another laugh, sitting up on his elbows. “No one has ever called me beautiful before. Not even when I’m dressed in all the...yeah.” This was added softly, almost like he was talking to himself, and Hux saw the blush reflected on Ben’s cheeks before he dropped back to the grass with a graceless huff.

Hux didn’t know what to say, and so he lowered himself to the grass as well. It was cool under his back, the scent of it fresh and soothing and so unlike the soggy grass on his own planet. The sky above them was practically on fire with the glitter of stars, the moons bright beacons far far away. He was almost chilly now with the sun gone, and after complaining so ardently about the heat of the day, he felt somewhat ridiculous when goosebumps erupted down his arms.

“We can go inside if you’re cold,” Ben offered quietly.

Hux shook his head, and then said no when he realized Ben probably couldn’t see it. _This is the most comfortable I’ve been in a long time, I don’t want to leave._

“Good.”

“Are you really reading my mind?” He couldn’t help asking now, when it was so obvious. But still, it was a bit off-putting - and also rather intriguing. 

Ben just chuckled. “Maybe a little, yeah.”

“Must be a handy trick when you’re dealing with negotiations. You can tell when everyone is lying to you.” 

Hux said this dryly, somewhat envious, but again Ben laughed softly. “It _is_ handy, but it’s also pretty tiring, hearing what everyone refuses to say out loud. It’s usually not happy pleasantries, I can tell you that.”

Hux laughed at this, the sound of it startling when he had been in such a distatant and dark place much too recently. It felt good to laugh. It felt freeing. Ben looked over at him, turning his head in the grass. There were a few bent blades of it sticking to his braided crown, but he didn’t seem to care. 

“Can I touch your cheek?” he asked, repeating his question from several minutes ago.

This time Hux relented, willing and curious now. Ben raised himself up on one elbow, turning his entire body toward Hux. He studied Hux’s face for a moment, perhaps confirming the permission he had been given, before slowly reaching out to brush the tips of his fingers along the skin that still stung angrily on Hux’s cheek. Those fingers made two passes, gentle and almost tickling, and then Ben laid his hand fully against Hux’s skin, palm covering his cheek. Hux stared up at him, unsure of what he was doing. But then warmth flooded his skin, tingling and solid, pouring from Ben’s palm and fingers. It was like nothing Hux had ever felt before.

Ben pulled his hand away after only a moment, letting his arm drop against his hip as he stayed propped on his elbow, looking down at Hux in the grass. “I can also heal,” he murmured. 

And Hux noticed that yes, the pain had disappeared. 

Ben reached out again suddenly and dragged a finger over Hux’s nose, where it was tight with sunburn. The warmth spread as it had before, bringing the pain away when Ben’s hand retreated. Hux’s own hand darted up to his face, rubbing over his nose and feeling only undamaged skin. The burn was gone, just like that.

Ben must have heard whatever dazed thoughts passed through Hux’s mind and he smiled widely. Hux stared at him, already missing the touch of this person he had known less than a day. There was something about him, something he had noticed what felt like an eternity ago now, in the market. 

Was Ben tricking him, with the Force he used to read Hux’s mind? The notion was a startling one, and the smile vanished from Ben’s face.

“No,” he said, voice low and urgent. “No, no, I wouldn’t do that to you. I promise, I’m not - not making you do anything. I just...liked you, like I said.” Before Hux could say anything to this, he started to move. “We can go inside. We probably should. This wasn’t a very good idea, was it? I’m really sorry.”

Something about the way Ben became so oddly shy as the words spilled out, bashful when he had been so forward before, spurred Hux into action. He grabbed Ben’s wrist before he could sit all the way up and tugged. As soon as Ben looked at him, Hux reached up to cup Ben’s face, pulling him down and down, back to the grass, until Hux could press their lips together without hesitation.

The kiss was far from perfect, especially when Hux had a moment of panic upon remembering that this man was a _king_ , what was Hux _thinking_ \- but Ben fell against Hux gratefully, arms framing Hux’s head in the grass, fingers threading through his hair. Ben sighed through his nose, the breath tickling and warm against Hux’s skin. His panicked thoughts vanished.

While not Hux’s first kiss by any stretch of imagination, it felt - different. Real. _Tender_. He pressed his palms tighter around Ben’s jaw, holding him closer, opening his mouth and letting the kiss deepen. Ben’s eyelashes fluttered against Hux’s nose, and it was thrilling.

Ben pulled away first, pressing his forehead down against Hux’s, lips still close enough that Hux could feel every breath between them.

“Arkanis is the only home I’ve ever known,” Hux whispered, suddenly wanting to share his own story the way Ben had so willingly shared his, wanting Ben to know him, to hear him and see him and understand him more than he perhaps already did. “I was born there,” he continued. Ben’s eyes slid shut and he nuzzled his nose against Hux’s, listening. “My mother - they weren’t married, and he always saw me as this - this thing, this _burden_ he never wanted. My father hates me, yet he refuses to allow me to leave him, keeps me so close even when he refuses to acknowledge me - it’s like he wants me to suffer just because I exist.”

The words flowed easily, now that he finally allowed them to leave his tongue freely.

“I am his property, as his son, and I want nothing more than to leave, to start my life over, but I don’t know how.” He squeezed his eyes closed when they burned with tears he had never shed, even when the darkness was overwhelming. It all felt so far away now, here, in this soft grass with the stars glowing above and Ben so near. “I don’t know _how_ , but I wish…”

Ben kissed him again when his voice ran out, when the words stopped. He pressed little kisses to Hux’s cheek, his nose, his eyelids, back to his mouth, over and over. “Do you want me to help you?” Ben asked, close, so close, and the question parted his mouth directly into Hux’s. “I will, I’ll do anything if you ask me.”

Hux ran his fingers wonderingly over the scar, over Ben’s dark eyebrows. “Yes,” he murmured, both feeling like himself and not, like he was jumping off a ledge he had never known existed within his soul. “Yes. Help me. Please.”

“I will.” _I promise._ Ben covered the small distance between them to press their lips together again and again and again. Hux felt the billowing sleeves of Ben’s robe, that flowing open skirt over his pants, the beautiful fabric of swirling galaxies, being pressed down down down into the grass under their bodies. 

_I promise, I promise._

_You’re free now._


	3. Chapter 3

Hux woke to gentle sunlight, mottled through gauzy cream curtains. He opened his eyes, immediately remembering this was not his room. A pang of alarm, of searing shame, hit his stomach, but then Ben moved behind him and wrapped his arm over Hux’s waist, pressed a soft kiss to the back of his neck, to his bare shoulder. The shame faded as quickly as it flared. Hux grinned, unable to help himself.

“Gil will be in soon,” Ben mumbled into Hux’s skin, kissing a line up his neck again and to his ear when he spoke.

“Gil?” Hux turned his head as far as he could, with the way Ben was holding him so tightly, and caught a glimpse of wild black hair. He wanted to touch that hair, wanted to feel it between his fingers again, as he had so many times last night. He rolled over, facing Ben instead, and did just that, letting the fingers of one hand get lost in those messy waves.

Ben gave him a lopsided smile at the touch, and he sighed contentedly as he scooted forward inelegantly to bump their noses together. “My valet,” he said in response to Hux’s question, his words slurred with sleep. “He’ll be here soon to bring me breakfast and a lengthy to-do list for the day. And clothes,” he added as an afterthought.

It was hard to stop the flush that rose up Hux’s cheeks at that, though it was more with a residual memory of everything they had done the night before and how, exactly, their clothing had been lost. Ben’s galaxy-gem robes were strewn in various pieces throughout the room leading in from the doorway, and Hux’s clothes were...somewhere. He should probably find them.

“I can ask Gil to bring you something of mine,” Ben offered when he caught that thought flitting through Hux’s mind. He nuzzled tiredly against Hux’s face. “Or I can send him to get your own things. But really, not everything I wear is garish and loud, if you want something from the closet.”

“Okay,” Hux agreed, surprising himself somewhat at how easily this was happening, how easily he was _letting_ it happen.

Ben opened his eyes, his smile widening before he pressed forward to kiss Hux’s cheekbone, just beside his nose. His jaw, his lips, his neck, wherever he could reach already being so close. But then he pulled back a bit, waiting for Hux to look at him before he said, “Just trust me today, okay? I’ll ask Gil to put Arkanis back on the docket for this morning and I’ll help you find a new life, whatever you want. Here, or anywhere in the galaxy.”

Hux nodded, his voice catching in his throat. Last night felt so far away already, as if once his feet touched the ground he would be whipped back to everything he was running from. But here, with Ben’s arms still around him and his body so warm and close and real, Hux almost believed it would be possible.

“It _is_ possible,” Ben breathed, pressing their foreheads together. “He does not own you. No one does. I’ll give you a way to escape him.” 

_I promise._

Before Hux could respond, there was a sharp knock at the door. Ben gave him another kiss, parting his lips and licking into Hux’s mouth, and then he was gone, sitting up and pulling on a silky black dressing gown so he could open the door. Hux watched quietly, content for the first time that he could remember, as Ben let Gil inside and took a small tray of food from him to set on a table in the living area.

Ben asked for more food and an extra shirt, and Hux curled under the blankets, pressing his nose into Ben’s pillows. Waiting for the inevitable, almost, but somehow he wasn’t as afraid of that as he had been the day before.

xXx

As promised, the clothing Ben provided for Hux was not nearly as over the top as anything he had ever seen Amidala wear. Actually, the top was a comfortable cream linen, perfect for the heat of a summer day in Naboo’s sun. It was embroidered in a dark thread, covered in rounded geometric patterns that reflected the architecture of Theed’s domed city. He felt surrounded, as he wore it, engulfed in the power Ben had awoken in him over the many hours they spent together.

An aide had brought a missive to the Arkanis delegation before Hux left Ben’s suite, telling them their negotiations had been rescheduled for midday. Hux was sure his father was smug with the idea he himself had somehow reinstated the meeting with the king, and Hux had no desire to give him the actual reason. As if Brendol would believe him, anyway.

The delegation was in the living area, enjoying a large breakfast by the bright sunny windows, and Hux was glad to have eaten already with Ben. He let himself into the suite and immediately made for his bedroom. He wasn’t surprised when Brendol followed him, leaving his breakfast and stomping down the hallway just as Hux opened the bedroom door. 

It was inescapable, his father’s wrath and violent rage that so often left Hux bruised and aching. Yet this time he stopped, turned to face him without fear. 

This, Hux’s not cowering the way he had the previous night, gave Brendol pause only for a moment. “Where have you been?” he hissed, the fury obvious as he leaned close. He suddenly noticed the shirt, finer than anything he had in his own closet. His lips curled in disgust. “Whoring yourself out to Amidala, were you? I should kill you where you stand, boy, for your repugnant habits. Do you really think - ” he reached out and grabbed the collar of Hux’s shirt, squeezing close to his neck, “that pathetic excuse of a man can hide you behind his pretty skirts? You’re _mine_ , Armitage, and you’ve made a mistake forgetting that.” 

Hux sneered, all of the rage from yesterday and so many years before building in his chest as he grabbed at his father’s wrist and shoved his hand forcefully away. “I have never _forgotten_ anything,” he bit out venomously. “Now fuck off.”

He took one step back and slammed the door in his father’s stunned face.

xXx

Brendol gave Hux the cold shoulder after that. Hux did not care in the slightest, and as their congregation made their way to the conference room, he relished the silence amongst their heavy footfalls in the beautiful hallways.

Soon, soon, this would all be over. One way or another.

The conference room was large, open with intricately designed marble floors and pale marble pillars circling the rounded circumference of the room. A beautiful wooden table was at the center, set up with holoprojectors and directly under a round glass ceiling that let in a marvelous amount of light. No one else had arrived yet, and the ambassadors found themselves seats around the table.

Brendol gave Hux a nasty look when he attempted to take a seat near the head of the table, and so rather than pick another fight he sat at the far end. He had changed his clothing to pieces from his own wardrobe and the loss of that beautiful tunic felt like he had lost some kind of armor. He watched as Brendol pulled up maps and lists and spreadsheets - all things Hux had put together himself - up on the projectors, the figures of them all blooming like ghostly flowers above the tabletop.

Ben - Kylo Amidala, now, again, with the clothing and makeup - swept into the room before everyone had settled.

They all startled to attention, shuffling to their feet to bow as Amidala moved toward his chair, a throne in its own right for how elegantly carved it was. Hux stood with the others and caught Ben’s eye for the briefest moment. He was dressed in white today, a flowing gown of ruffled fabric layered over and over and over to look like feathers, dipped in red and gold. The ensemble glowed in the light from overhead, sparkling on the golden cords and chains braided into his dark hair, hanging down around his face with droplets of red gemstones.

Last night he wore a galaxy, and now he was clothed in the dawn. Hux almost did not recognize him, against the memory of Ben from the previous night. But those dark eyes met his again, across the long table, and something in Hux’s stomach squeezed with relief.

Amidala took his seat and everyone else followed. He glanced at Brendol, his face impassive.

“Your Majesty,” Brendol began earnestly, as though he were not rotten to the core, as though everyone did not know the kind of man he was. His voice was confident, loud. “If you look at this chart here, we are asking for a mere thirty-four percent of - ”

Amidala interrupted him with a single wave of his gloved hand, eyes hard as silence fell. “I will give you full mining rights to Crait.”

Brendol - and everyone else in the room - ogled at him as he spoke, giving them all more than they had even dared think they could get before negotiations had even started. Hux’s heart beat strong in his chest, seeing the play coming as it unfolded. 

_trust me_

It rang in his head, clear as if Ben had spoken the words aloud, and Hux swallowed around the tension holding his throat tight, anxious now for what was about to happen, when he could not see the future any more than the nose on his face. But then Amidala continued, not leaving space for anyone else to speak.

“I will give you these rights on one condition.” He glared at Brendol, his gaze moving listlessly over the rest of the group until it landed on Hux. “Your secretary remains here.”

“My - what - ” 

It took Brendol only a moment to regain himself, and Hux bit the inside of his cheek against the storm that was about to explode. He was a fool to think anything could change, he knew he was. This would never work, his father would never let him go just because someone wanted to help him. No one _could_ help him, and it was ignorant of him to think something good would happen. He sank down in his seat, sickened with the thought of this not changing anything, of having to return home. 

“My _son_? You want my son to stay here? With _you_?” Brendol asked, almost hissing with anger at the proposition. He leapt to his feet, face red in a way Hux recognized as his boiling point. His hammy fingers clutched the edge of the table as if he wanted to break it. “I am appalled, Your _Majesty_ , that you would let your personal - _affection_ cloud your judgement. This is a poor way for someone of your position to act, and I question your ability to govern if this is how you make your choices.”

The ambassadors glanced among each other, concerned, though Hux heard the word Brendol had wanted to say - had almost said, and had said to Hux so many times over the course of his life. Affliction. His _affliction_. Apparently Amidala heard the unsaid word, as well, and rose slowly to his feet, the chair screeching backward as he did. His face was cold as he met Brendol’s eyes, looking down his nose from his greater height. 

“I may not be your king,” Amidala said icily, levelly, “but I still suggest you watch how you speak to me. We would not want your...violent afflictions to get the best of you once again.”

Brendol’s red face tinged purple but, for his part, he seemed somewhat cowed by this show of power and managed to get hold of his temper. “Armitage is my _property_ ,” he said angrily, attempting a different tact. “How dare you think you can simply - ” 

“Armitage is not your property,” Amidala snapped furiously. The other ambassadors at the table began to fidget nervously, confused to be caught in such dangerous crossfire out of nowhere. All Hux could do was stare blankly as his life was fought over, wanting to speak but not knowing what to say. “You wanted these mining rights so badly, and all I ask for in return is a man you loathe to remain behind. You have made it clear to me that you have no respect for him, and I will not tolerate that. Make your choice. Crait, for your son.”

The fierce hardness of his voice made it clear there were to be no concessions, no compromise. Amidala sat without ceremony, his dark eyes flashing.

Brendol looked down the table at Hux, who returned the look with a burning face. But he could feel the anxiety leaving, could tell his gaze was strong as he stared down the man who had terrorized him for so long. He narrowed his eyebrows in an obvious challenge, daring his father to say no. His single act of rebellion and it would garner him his freedom. Brendol’s hatred was palpable, seething between them as if the glare alone would kill Hux on the spot.

“Careful, father,” Hux said slowly, softly, when Brendol did not speak, high now with the recognition that he had won and relishing every word. “Be sure to hide those traitorous thoughts I know you are considering. Kylo Amidala can read your mind, haven’t you heard the rumors?”

Brendol’s face paled and he whipped his head around to find Amidala watching him with dangerous black eyes from behind his painted mask. “Fine!” he spat. “Keep him! All the good it will do you.” He immediately began gathering his things, shutting down the holorecorder that had been fully ignored. The other ambassadors hastily followed his lead, very ready to leave the situation.

Amidala beckoned his valet forward, the man Hux now recognized as Gil. “Make a note, please,” he said conversationally and loud enough for Brendol to hear. “Armitage Hux is promoted to General of our Auxiliary Space Fleet, effective immediately. I believe the son you treat with such _kindness_ now outranks you, Commandant,” he added flippantly and with such dripping sarcasm that Hux bit out a laugh.

Brendol stared at Amidala with a face full of that hatred Hux knew so well, hatred that had been forced on him for the entirety of his life. He stormed from the room without another word. But then what Amidala said sunk in, very quickly, and Hux blinked. 

The room cleared out quickly after that, until only Ben and Hux remained, both still seated at the table. Hux’s father had left without him. He was free of him, of life under his vicious shadow. It was over. Ben’s face softened, and even under the makeup Hux could tell his mask was gone.

“You don’t have to accept,” Ben told him quickly. “The position. I just thought - well, why not burn the bastard while I could?” 

He got to his feet as Hux considered this, considered everything that had just happened, and walked around the table to Hux’s side. He held out a gloved hand and Hux took it automatically, only a little surprised when Ben tugged Hux up out of the chair. Ben pulled his white satin gloves off and dropped them on the table so he could cup Hux’s face in his warm hands, tilting his face up until their eyes met.

“Will you go somewhere with me?” he asked quietly. Hux felt lost in his eyes, the dark brown giving way to copper in the sunlight from the window high above.

He couldn’t help himself, wrapping his hands around Ben’s wrists and leaning up to kiss him with all the emotion toiling in his chest. The paint on Ben’s lips was soft, smoothing out under Hux’s mouth as he kissed him twice more, heady and awestruck and lost for words. Ben’s fingers slid back into his hair as the long glittering chains of gemstones clinked against Hux’s face, and he smiled into the press of their lips before pulling back. Somehow the makeup on Ben’s face was undisturbed, and Hux snorted through his nose.

“You wanted to take me somewhere?”

xXx

The speeders were old - antique, even - but they were fast, and Hux felt more free than he had in ages as the sharp wind bit through his hair, against his face around his goggles. Ben was ahead of him, leading them gods knew where, but Hux didn’t care, didn’t care where they went or what they did. His father had left the planet only an hour ago and already his life was different, was open to him.

They had been riding out through the clearing countryside, away from the chaotic tumult of the city, for almost forty minutes. They fled the palace together as soon as Ben had changed from his finery and the moment Brendol’s transport had left the dock. The lengthening fields, the tall grasses and freely running creeks in the brilliant sunshine, were all so different than anything Hux had seen before, on rainy and dark Arkanis. He wondered if, despite his initially less than warm reception to the blazing sunlight...if he might find a home here.

A few minutes later, Ben slowed and stopped in the middle of a large field, full of lush grasses and vibrant wildflowers warmed by the sun. Hux powered off his speeder and was suddenly struck by the sound of running water very nearby. He looked around, taking in the scene around him, and noticed a cliffside dropping away to their right. He got off the speeder and walked toward it, curious.

They were high in a mountain now, and the ground opened into a ledge that fell steeply away. But when he brought his gaze up from the earth he immediately recognized where the rushing water was coming from. The valley opened into a u-shape around them, grassy and rocky and dotted with those wildflowers, and there, in the deep bend of the u, dozens of waterfalls broke over the cliffside.

Some fell heavily down into a riverbed far below, crashing with all their weight, while many others - smaller streams of water, broken up by large rocks at the ledge - those were wisped away into mist halfway down, where the sun caught the tiny droplets and created more rainbows than Hux could count. Small ones and large, dipping to and fro inside the cloudy mist.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?”

Ben came up behind him to look out at the waterfalls and rainbows, as well, close behind Hux but not touching him. Hux glanced over his shoulder and Ben smiled sweetly at him. “My mother,” he said softly, “she used to bring me out here when I was little. When we would both have bad days or when...when I was still trying to control my anger - she would bring me out here for hours, to sit in the grass and watch the water. I always felt so happy here with her. My dad never came with us, it was a special place only for me and Mom.”

“Do you miss her?” Hux asked, glancing again at Ben’s unadorned and tranquil face. “Your mother.”

Ben looked at him, his smile tight now but no less sweet. “Yeah,” he said. “I haven’t seen her in years. She doesn’t come back to Naboo very often, not since I was elected in her place after she left. And I - well, I can’t leave the planet very often myself, can I?”

Hux nodded and reached back with one hand toward Ben, who took it gratefully in his and squeezed their fingers together. Hux turned his gaze back on the waterfalls. His chest was light, the heaviness there lifted, and he could not remember when he had last felt this...this _calm_.

“My mother left me when I was young,” Hux said. “Did I tell you this already last night?” When Ben shook his head silently, Hux continued. “She and my father were not married, and he forced her to give up custodial rights so he could keep me himself. I haven’t seen her in so long, I don’t even remember what she looks like. My father refused to answer my questions about her when I was a boy and eventually I just gave up.”

“We could look for her, if you want?”

Hux whipped his head around, the unexpected response taking him by surprise. When he used to tell others about this, people usually responded with pity, not really caring to offer any kind of solution. As if poor young Hux had a life no one would touch, no one could change. He had grown up believing that himself, after so long. 

“Yes,” he replied after a moment. “I’d appreciate that.” 

Ben just nodded, and nothing else needed to be said on the matter.

Hux tugged Ben’s hand, still grasped tightly in his, until Ben came to stand beside him rather than slightly behind. Hux studied his face, grinning as he took in those features that had scared him so badly just the day before. He raised his other hand and ghosted his fingers along the gashed scar cutting Ben’s perfect skin. “Are you going to tell me how you got this?”

Ben laughed and lowered his eyes. “Someday,” he answered, “sure. It’s a long story. An assasination attempt when I was twenty.”

“Oh.” Hux frowned, both intrigued and horrified. “Is that - is that still a thing that might happen to you? Someone trying to assassinate you?”

“Not if they know what’s good for them,” Ben said in quiet response. 

“Good, good.” Hux studied the scar for another moment and then pressed his palm flat to Ben’s cheek, his other hand still held tightly in Ben’s. “Thank you. For helping me.”

Ben’s grin widened again and he leaned down to press a brief kiss to the corner of Hux’s mouth, another fully against his lips. Chaste, sweet. “I was never going to leave you to fight that battle against your father alone.”

“And now I never have to see him again.” _Or feel him punch me, or push me, or berate me_ -

“No,” Ben agreed, whether to his spoken words or unspoken thoughts. “Never again. And as I promised - ” He paused, glancing back at the fields and waterfalls, voice falling. “I will gladly help you find a new home, wherever you want. You are under no obligation to stay here.”

“But - ”

Hux bit his tongue before anything could spill out, so used to keeping himself close lest he face violent humiliation for it at his father’s hand. But then he quickly reconsidered and squeezed Ben’s hand tightly, not letting go. “But what if I _want_ to stay here? With you? Can I - can I do that?”

“Sure - yes, of course you can.” It was impossible to miss the happiness, the excitement, in those brief words, and Hux smiled, relief flooding him.

“Then that is what I want. I want to stay here in this damnable sun.”

Ben laughed, pulling his hand free of Hux’s only to wrap him tightly in his arms, holding him close. Hux went without a fight, tucking his head down against Ben’s chest. He was so unused to physical affection, but it was hard now, to say he didn’t like it. He wondered, fleetingly, if this was a dream, if he would open his eyes to see this all ripped away. But Ben’s scent was already so familiar, so calming. And he could still feel the wind, could hear the waterfalls, could smell the grass and wildflowers.

Not a dream. Not anymore.

“Certainly, General,” Ben said into his hair.

Hux had forgotten about the title in all the hubbub of the day, but it sunk in now, again. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that yet. “Am I really promoted to general, when I’ve done nothing to achieve it?”

“You went through the military academy on Arkanis, didn’t you?”

“Yes.”

“Then yeah, you really are promoted to general, if you want it.”

Hux wanted it. Very, very badly.

“And,” Ben continued, likely hearing that thought and tactfully ignoring it, “if my hunch about you doing all of your father’s work for him over the last several years is correct, then it also means you are a brilliant strategist. So yes, I’d say you are general material. Secretary my ass,” he added under his breath with a little chuckle.

“Very well,” Hux accepted with false umbrage, hiding his smile against Ben’s soft cotton shirt. “If you insist.” 

The sun beat down on them as they stood together, listening to the waterfalls and the wind as it whipped past them. Listening to the sounds of the grass, of the leaves in the trees. The air was fresh, fragrant with all the flowers dotting the field around them. 

The sun was warm, and Hux was glad.


End file.
